Attended WAVES today after a lengthy break. Was good to catch up with my fellow mentalists and find out how their Christmases had gone. Compared to some my holiday was a breeze. Sitting there I’m thinking that I’ve come to the end of this stage of my life. WAVES has been incredibly important in my recovery. I’ve had a few eureka moments where I’ve thought ‘oh yeh, that’s why this has happened!’
I’ve been taught the mechanics of good mental health and by applying lessons learnt I have come through the darkest most desperate times of my life. I never thought I’d ever do it, to recover to get where I am today. I’m extremely proud of myself and I hope that my family are too.
What a future I have ahead of me! I’m volunteering at West Stow and Sutton Hoo. I’m on another dig this Summer and most importantly I’m considering starting an Archaeology degree with Leicester.
It’s all very very ironic that the journey I’ve been on wouldn’t have been possible without meeting the wrong people at the wrong time or the right people at the wrong time or even the right people at the right time!
For those that don’t know 2.5 years ago I tried to hang myself. Thanks to friends and a large hammer I was rescued just in time, my oxygen saturation level was at 80%. Since then I have battled every day to understand, to reflect, to forgive and to forge a new me. I didn’t wake up in hospital shouting’Eureka!’. It has been a conscious decision to survive, to learn and eventually to thrive. I want my children to be proud of me, to look upon me as a harsh lesson in how to overcome near tragedy, to go on and become what you should be, what you dreamed to be.
In 1982 I wrote to Prof Martin Carver about joining the new dig at Sutton Hoo . I received a reply saying he’d love to have me on the dig. I was only 15 or so and couldn’t drive, couldn’t get there and my life went in another direction. Last Summer I found my place, where I should’ve been all those years ago, digging trenches, going back in time. Yesterday I found myself back at Sutton Hoo volunteering to be a guide! Now I may be starting an Archaeology degree which I wasn’t allowed to even start back in 1995.
From being in such a dark lonely frightening place I find myself looking forward to a future with excitement. By the age of 60 you may find me in the middle of February covered in mud freezing cold in a trench somewhere. You know what? I’ll be the happiest you’ve ever seen me!
Don't stop going to WAVES coz you could become the inspiration someone else needs to not give up.