I’m on the up again. Seems I’m not ready to come off one of my pills. I managed to get out again last night to do some shopping. It seems such a simple thing to do doesn’t it, going shopping. I have many reasons not to go out. I’m still in fear of getting the virus and I still suffer from anxiety and feelings of panic. When I think of the person I used to be, brave, unthinking and first to help in any accident or incident I feel so sad. I grieve for the person I once was. I think I’m becoming that person again, slowly but surely. Outwardly everyone sees a 6.2, 190lb healthy man not knowing that every slamming car door or alarm sends me into a panic. I am a bag of nerves...... in other news I have a photo shoot this Friday, some mean and moody and some headshots for my profiles. I’m looking forward to it but already the butterflies are starting! I hope you all have a wonderful day. Remember to try and make at least one persons day a bit brighter.
In case anyone has forgotten what I look like without a beard see below, although god knows what I look like underneath nowadays!
![](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/148121_5ff5baf8b1c34fedb7d82c56a5095c0a~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_719,h_720,al_c,q_85,enc_auto/148121_5ff5baf8b1c34fedb7d82c56a5095c0a~mv2.jpg)
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