Blame game

It seemed my post on narcissistic abuse struck a chord with many of you. It’s not my intention to write every day and extensively on the subject but I will post on occasion. My reason being that talking about my attempted suicide and recovery has helped some of you, then writing about abuse may do so as well.

Whilst I was being gaslighted, physically and mentally abused,I frequently lost my temper with her. I felt extremely guilty at the time and until very recently blamed myself for doing so. To those are feeling guilty remember this.…. It is yet another narcissistic weapon in their arsenal. By making you lose control the blame is shifted rapidly to you thus exonerating themselves from any responsibility. A narcissist will convince you also that you are the problem. Whilst you are tangled up in emotions ranging from adoration to hate they will turn the screw. You’ve all seen a cat playing with a mouse for ages before, finally bored with it all they strike the killing blow. That’s like living with a narc. You are not the problem they are.

Following on from that the narc will pretend that you are the worst person on the planet. So convinced of this fact that they will tell their ‘truth’ to friends and family and in my case the police. She’d convinced herself that she was the victim of my violence and narcissism. It’s all a very clever system that these empty people use.

Remember that the narcissist had chosen you because you had the very qualities that they will forever lack, love, empathy kindness and respect. When they are old and their looks and superficial charm fade away to nothing you will always have your humanity.

Should we shut up and move on? I say no. We should all talk about it openly and freely, without guilt or blame.

I love you all!